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Thursday, February 10, 2005

First Weekend Continued - Ilkley Moor

So, up at 9am. On a Sunday. Yes, I suffer for the art... Prod the three people who kipped over, and ask them if they fancy any sort of brekkie from the local greasy spoon. I get an order for a sausage sarnie, something veggie and toast. When I get to the caf, I go for a Big Breakfast Bap, and get Carl a bacon buttie to lure him to my house early.

He and Lucy arrive by 10.20, and we head over to Bradford to meet up with the rest of the people coming on the road trip. Today we total 10 as various people are otherwise engaged. Duncan arrives first with a frisbee and a 'whistling bomb' contraption, which when chucked around makes an eerie whistling. This keeps us all entertained, while the dirty stop outs pop back to their flats to get changed. This takes just over 15 minutes.

I then give those gathered a choice - do they want to take a trip to an outside or inside location? It is a 5/4 split for Outside (I abstain), which I found surprising on a cold February day. The inside location choices would have been:-
Mother Shipton's Cave
Leeds Art Gallery
& York Dungeon
Instead, the throng have to choose from:-
Brimham Rocks
The White Horse near Thirsk
The Cow & Calf on Ilkley Moor.
There is a split on the decision. Fortunately, we use Jonboy our set designer/tech as a decider (he is to join us later in the day). Ilkley Moor it is.

We pile into two cars, with me driving one and Carl the other. In my car on the way, I initiate some story telling, by recounting the tale of splitting up with someone in Istanbul. This gets me the following 4 stories in reply-
Chris - Three romantic gestures and why he will never do any again.
Sidrah - Being Assaulted by a woman with a baby, when coming out of the cinema.
Michelle - Taking a new trip to school and getting covered in mud.
Nicki - Various injuries relating from gymnastics which she will never be able to do again.

We arrive at the Cow and Calf Pub, and decide that as it's 12.15pm that lunch is the first priority. For me, it doesn't seem like that long since breakfast...
We get a decent sized table near an open log fire and conversation develops. I initiate various conversations, as well as getting people to play Chinese Whispers with various foreign phrases. I also pass the dictaphone around and get those assembled to answer the following six questions.
What's your Favourite Film?
What's your Favourite CD?
What's your Favourite TV Programme?
How would they describe their First Course?
What's their Earliest Memory?
What's their Favourite Quote?

The responses are as follows...

Platoon Lord Of The Rings Magnolia Trainspotting Mary Shelley's Frankenstein Money Pit 12 Monkeys Singin' In The Rain Cassanova Labyrinth...
Scream 2 Soundtrack The Prodigy Experience LCD Soundsystem Abbey Road Under The Pink Queer As Folk Soundtrack Nightwish CD Raise The Roof Pure Genius Blues Bros. Soundtrack...
Neighbours(!) Spaced Six Feet Under Boys From The Blackstuff Monty Python Sex & The City Jonathan Creek Midsummer Murders Spaced(Again) Scrubs
Moist Unsatisfying Scrumptious Bootylicious Tasty Hot Spicy Weird Tasty Gooey Tough
Giant Cookie Mexico Beach Escalator Sleeping Beauty Baby Bed Pushchair Portholes Sister's Birth Eating Cement Cable Car Falling Off Bike
Stand Tall, Walk Proud, Run Naked
My Friends, You Bow To No-One
Tell People & They Forget, Teach People & They Remember, Involve People & They Learn
I Can Resist Anything Except Temptation
Ecoute Le Blais Qui Leve
It's Too Late, I've Withered Away
Well Actually I'm Only A Friar, I Can Swear As Much As I Want, Dammit
I'm H20 Intolerant
The Best Way To Know Life Is To Love Many Things
It's 106 Miles To Chicago, We've Got A Full Tank Of Gas, A Pack Of Cigs, It's Dark And We're Wearing Sunglasses
Never Underestimate The Predictability Of Stupidity
They've Run Out Of Brownies Folks, It's An Emergency (This last one was in response to the fact that the pub had run out of a dessert, and nothing to do with small Guides...)
Other things recorded are Chris' response to eating a Cherry Tomato for the first time (he doesn't like it), Carl recounting a rude limerick from Christie In Love (the last show we both acted in, by Howard Brunton) but paraphrased to include my name and Nicki giving us a random fact about Singin' In The Rain (they put milk in the water to make the rain show up on Technicolor).

Meal over, it's out to the rocks. Clearly some of the cast are more comfortable with the concept of being out in the freezing cold than others...
The frisbee and the bomb come in handy for keeping people distracted. Soon, we are up on the tops. I ask a further 3 questions.
Which three words describe how you're feeling?
Choose a rock, and use three words to tell me why you have chosen it.
Find a piece of graffiti on the rock and tell me about it.

The responses are as follows...

On Topada World Pretty Darn Good In Power, Cold Cold, Spaced, Mellow Frustrated, Expecting, Hopeful Weazy, Stressed, Relaxed Calm, Reflective, Full (?) Free, Cold, Renewed Calm, Relaxed, Soothed Relaxed, Open, Peaceful Very Very Cold. (Bit of repetition here, but it's interesting that there was a split between people who just found it cold, to people who were relaxed).
Because It Moves Tri Immovable, Solid, Cold Flat, Square, Pool Small And Edgy Like A Wave Interesing, Central, Different On The Edge It's Angular Subtle, Hidden, Iceberg-Like It's The Closest. (Emma and Duncan choose to make a joint statement, as they pick the same rock).
DJ Stanley Sucks Cock For Rock SM'CA 1947 Kes Scottish MC's Always Dobbon Family/ Gordon Ondon Jill Ogden Jackie 1973 JC Sinead D Carrie + Rachel 1999 + Smiley Face In Loving Memory Of My Grandma + Grandad Mr. & Mrs. Dixon 1952 Olive 1968 Richard Neil '+ Linda 98 Wigglesworth. (Plenty of stories behind the graffiti, my favourite being that Raf believed that Jesus Christ had been to Ilkley Moor, hence the JC).

Throughout this, Carl takes some pics and a bit of video (Wanna see? Check out here http://gust.no-ip.com/ihn/cow_and_calf/) . At the end, we collect three people burping (a belated appreciation of the meal?), Carl creeps up on a Grouse and I find a piece of pottery.

On the way back to Bradford, we swap car loads. I tell the same story of being dumped again. The reponses are:-
Raf - Having nearly converted from being a Jew to the Muslim faith for a relationship.
Duncan - The experience of moving from Scotland to Accrington
Lucy - The people who attended her birthday party last week, and what they got up to.
Emma heads back with Jonboy.

We head straight for the bar, and I only realise how knackered I am when I sit down. I decide to scrap the idea of going to the cinema, and instead go home and watch Harold & Maude (Great Film - Hal Ashby is a new hero for me, despite dying yonks ago) and the top 100 Music Videos. I am reminded of my grandma dying by the Sinead O'Connor video for Nothing Compares 2U (She died when it was number 1).

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